Parenting from Proverbs: Guarding the Mouth

Proverbs 13:2-3:

A man shall eat well by the fruit of his mouth,
But the soul of the unfaithful feeds on violence.
 He who guards his mouth preserves his life,
But he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction.

The book of Proverbs has much to say about one’s speech. Obviously, how we use our words is very important. We can build up with our words; we can tear down with our words. We can tell others about Jesus with our words; we can destroy Jesus with our words. We can speak the truth with our words; we can spread lies with our words. Our words are very powerful. Teaching my children about their words is an important task that I have as their parent. Teaching my children about their words starts now when they are little. I must encourage the truth. I must encourage kindness. I must encourage talking about Jesus and spiritual things. I must discourage lies and hatred. And, at all times, I must look to myself, and make sure my words follow after righteousness.

More parenting from Proverbs

Parenting from Proverbs: The Lips of the Righteous

Proverbs 10:31-32:

The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, But the perverse tongue will be cut out.
The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable, But the mouth of the wicked what is perverse.

The first line of verse 31 as well as the first line of verse 32 really struck me: “the mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom,” and “the lips of the righteous know what is acceptable.” My first thought was that I need to teach my children to have righteous words in their mouths, and, while that is certainly something I should teach them, it also applies to me. As a parent, I need to have a righteous mouth that speaks wisdom and knows what is acceptable. I certainly struggle at times with always having a mouth that speaks wisdom and knows what is acceptable, particularly in the type of attitude I portray. One thing (of many, I’m sure) that I need to greatly work on where parenting is concerned is my patience. When I get frustrated with my children, I have to remember that Ella is only 3 and Troy is only 2 (well, almost 2). I need to have patience with  my words and have a mouth that is righteous: wise and knowledgeable of what is acceptable. In order to have a righteous mouth, I must study God’s Word as Psalm 119:172 states: “My tongue shall speak of Your word, For all Your commandments are righteousness.”

More parenting from Proverbs

Attitude Check

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the type of attitude and general “vibe” I give off to those around me. I know that I often portray a more negative attitude, even though I don’t necessarily consider myself a negative person. I’m very happy, and yet I know that I have a tendency to get bogged down in little things that might make me seem otherwise. I think that sometimes the reason I come across negative is because I have this silly feeling that if something isn’t going exactly right with me that I need everyone around me to know about it, and perhaps feel sorry for me, or something along those lines.

I started thinking about these things because I was noticing a pattern on Facebook (as well as on blogs and Twitter) of individuals whose statuses or updates or comments are mostly negative or depressing or, on the flip side, mostly positive or uplifting. I started noticing that I would quickly click “next” in Google reader when coming across certain blogs because I knew the post would likely be a downer, or that I could already predict that someone’s status was going to be a complaint before I even read it. Conversely, I found myself looking forward to reading updates or notes from others because I knew their words would be encouraging in some way or another, whether that be a sweet compliment to someone, a comment of thanks to God for rain, or something great or funny their children said or did.

With all of that said, this post isn’t about the idea that I think that someone should only post happy or uplifting things. Life is life, and sometimes we’ll be down, and expressing those things to others whether it be on Facebook, Twitter, a blog, a text, or over a Sonic drink (I’d say coffee, but I don’t drink it!) is part of the human experience. However, I want to be careful about the attitude that I’m giving off to others.  In addition to being careful about the attitude I’m giving off to others, I need to be careful about what is really in my heart. After all, outward expressions (whether written or verbal or otherwise), are likely a reflection of the heart. I don’t want to be the blogger or the poster that turns readers away with negativity; after all, I’m a Christian, and my joy should be never shaken because it is founded in Jesus Christ.

(On a total side note, this is the photo from my good to wow entry last week. I never got around to showing the edit, but there it is!)

Be Careful What You Say

People often talk about the need to be careful about what you say around kids because they'll repeat you - good or bad. Even though Ella is barely two years old, I've already noticed how much she repeats what we say. In fact, I've caught some phrases that I say often that I didn't realize I even used. I've even noticed that she repeats the tone and manner in which I say something. It has been eye-opening at times to the fact that I don't always use the right attitude in my speech.

Truly, though, I need to be careful with what I say all the time. Not only because my two year old might repeat it, but because there is a higher standard.  Consider Proverbs 15:3: “The eyes of the Lord are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good.” God is always knowledgeable of the speech we use even when others may not be.

What type speech should I use?

The speech of the worthy woman in Proverbs 31 is commended: “She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness.” (Proverbs 31:26)

Writing to the Colossians, Paul instructs: “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.” (Colossians 4:6)

Consider a few passages from Proverbs (there are many others):

Proverbs 10:20: “The tongue of the righteous is choice silver; The heart of the wicked is worth little.”

Proverbs 10:31: “The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, But the perverse tongue will be cut out.”

Proverbs 15:2: “The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, But the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness”

Proverbs 21:23: “Whoever guards his mouth and tongue Keeps his soul from troubles.”

Our tongue is a powerful tool – for good or evil. We must guard the words we use!