Blessed By A Choice

As my husband and I quickly approach our ten year anniversary, I’m more grateful everyday for the choice that I made in my spouse. I’m thankful that I chose a spouse who is going to help my walk with God and not hinder it. I’m thankful that I chose a spouse who is committed to our family and committed to raising our children in the Lord.  I’m thankful that I chose a spouse who exhibits patience towards me. I’m thankful that I chose a spouse who works hard to provide for our family, spiritually, physically, and emotionally. I’m thankful that I chose a spouse who exhibits the agape love of 1 Corinthians 13 in our marriage.

As a 21 year old, I know that I did not fully grasp the importance of my decision when I said “I do.” I have a feeling that if I am blessed with another ten years of marriage that I’ll look back at this ten year mark and think I didn’t know the half of it then either. I’m so thankful that looking back over the past ten years brings joy, and that I’m confident and comforted by my choice in my spouse.

And, my prayer for my children choose someone who is a Christian, seeking to follow and obey God daily. As I pray for them, I must teach them. I have to first teach my children to love and obey God. If they don’t live that life, finding a spouse who loves God isn’t going to be important to them. There are many other influences in the world telling them what their priorities should be in a spouse, and loving God isn’t on that list. I also have to teach them about the gravity and significance of marriage. Once again, there are many other influences telling them that marriage isn’t significant, that it isn’t really that big of a deal such that marriage can be stopped and started again without consequence. However, marriage is something to be honored as precious and valuable.

Though teaching my children about marriage is a complex matter, instilling the importance of a spouse who loves God as well as instilling value and worth in marriage should lay a strong foundation for preparing them for marriage. I know that I am blessed because my spouse loves God and honors marriage, and my desire for each of my children is that they make choices that result in marriages that are blessings as well.

Parenting from Proverbs: Seeking Counsel and Wisdom

I started a new personal Bible study today – studying through Proverbs. One type of application I’m specifically looking for is how the wisdom from this book pertains to parenting, and how I can apply it in my life to be a better Christian parent.

There are many ideas that could be considered from Proverbs 1, but I specifically considered Proverbs 1:5.

A wise man will hear and increase learning, and a man of understanding will attain wise counsel.

Proverbs 1 is filled with information about wisdom, and how to gain wisdom in one’s life. Proverbs 1:5 states that a wise man will not only hear, but also increase learning as well as that a wise man will seek wise counsel. Parenting is a difficult task, and I know I can gain much by seeking wise counsel about parenting. Where can I go for wise counsel on parenting?

First, I need to look to God’s Holy Word and His example as our Father. Only a couple of verses down, Solomon writes in Proverbs 1:7: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.” I must have the proper view and reverence for God. God is the perfect example of a Father for us, and through His Word He has given us “all things that pertain to life and godliness” (2 Peter 1:3). This includes parenting.

Secondly, I can look to the instruction and counsel given to me by my parents. I am blessed with Christian parents, and I’m thankful to be raised in a Christian home and to be taught the wonderful gospel of Jesus Christ. Solomon writes in Proverbs 1:8-9: “My son, hear the instruction of your father, And do not forsake the law of your mother; For they will be a graceful ornament on your head, and chains about your neck.”

Additionally, I can look to other Christians for guidance in parenting. I think about Titus 2, and the instructions given to Titus by Paul to “speak the things which are proper for sound doctrine” (Titus 2:1). Titus was to instruct the older women to teach the younger women: “the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things— that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,  to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed” (Titus 2:3-5). On the surface, it might appear that only one of the items in the list – to love their children – would involve instruction about parenting; however, instruction in all the areas mentioned would encourage better parenting. For example, I think part of my duty as a Christian mother is to exhibit how to love and be obedient to my husband, and without doing such things I would certainly be lacking as a parent.

The last section of Proverbs 1 warns about the danger in not heeding instruction and wisdom, and concludes with the blessing that can come if one does seek wisdom: “But whoever listens to me [wisdom]  will dwell safely, And will be secure without fear of evil” (Proverbs 1:33). As a Christian, I need to be seeking Godly wisdom in all my endeavors, including parenting.

Shouldn’t I do that everyday?

My husband celebrated his birthday over the weekend. Leading up to his birthday I kept trying to think about what things I could do to make his day special; what things I could do to make his day easier; what things I could do to show him that I love him.

Many of the things I thought that I should do were things that I should do for him everyday (but don’t always). I was thinking about making him breakfast'; letting him choose where we ate for lunch; getting up first with the children in the morning so he could sleep a bit more; changing dirty diapers without trying to *pawn* it off on him; etc.

In several ways, I actually felt like I failed on his birthday in doing all the things I wanted to do. I was very tired (thanks to my children who have been waking up way too earlier these past couple of weeks), and I think I let my tiredness get in the way of how I had planned to treat him throughout the day. But, the truth is that I should as his wife, I should treat him like he is special everyday regardless of whether or not it is his birthday. He is special. He is deserving of me treating him as such. I should support him in all that he does. I should do my best to make his life easier. I should go about my daily business without complaining. I should seek to please him. I should I should seek to his best interests because I love him, not just in a *feel good* way, but because I should love him with an agape love; a self-sacrificing love. I know I don’t always do as I should as his wife, but I hope that I am growing more and more into the type of wife that always seeks out the best in and for my husband.

Growing Closer

I’m truly saddened and heart broken when I think about the state of many marriages in today’s society. Marriage is something that is so precious and special, yet it seems as though many people don’t treat it that way. I doubt many people enter into marriage with the intent of it only being a temporary thing, but they end up treating it that way through their actions. Marriage is hard work (like many worthwhile things in our lives), and I think it can be easy to forget that it requires work.

I am so thankful that my husband and I are growing closer as we continue in our marriage, rather than growing apart as is the case in many marriages today. I’m thankful for a husband who is committed to our marriage, and demonstrates a selfless attitude toward me. We aren’t perfect by any stretch, but I know we are moving in the right direction as we do grow closer, especially through keeping God as the center of our marriage and home. I feel as though our marriage has only gotten stronger as we have become parents, and as we face new challenges together  that come with parenting. I hope that we can teach our children the importance of marriage, and to seek out a spouse who also views marriage as sacred.

And Jesus said in Mark 10:6-9: “But from the beginning of the creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh;so then they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Trying Not to Be One of Those Moms

You know the ones I'm talking about. Those moms who once they have children suddenly quit taking care of themselves and who start wearing sweatpants and old t-shirts out everywhere and never really fix their hair. I like to watch makeover shows, and many times the woman they are making over is a woman who forgot how to take care of herself once she had kids. I never really understood how that could happen, even after having one child. But now, having two kids, I get it. I often find myself feeling like I have no time for me. Sometimes it feels like by the time I get one kid napping, the second kid is hungry, and by the time the second kid is fed, the first one is waking up from their nap, and on and on. How am I supposed to find time to take a shower in that schedule, much less the time to actually fix my hair?

I don't want to be slouchy when it comes to taking care of myself. It is hard, really hard, sometimes to have the motivation to take the time to take care of myself the way I should when I feel so crazy busy with the kids (among other things). It doesn't help that I work from home, meaning that no one will see me. What does it matter if I'm hanging out in my pjs or sweatpants all day long?

First off, I'm thinking about it wrong, because it does matter because my husband will see me even if no one else does. I'm taking for granted that he would probably prefer for me to take the time to get ready during rather than looking sloppy. (Now, don't get me wrong, being able to hang out in your pjs with your spouse is a great thing . . . what I'm talking about is separate from that).

Secondly, my problem is that I don't make myself get a good start to the day. I do have kid-free time if I get up early enough. It really doesn't take that long to get myself ready . . . it just seems that way when I wait until both kids are up and going. I want to make a conscious effort to take the time for myself that I need. I don't want to let myself become one of those moms who lose themselves because of their kids. I know I'll feel better about myself if I'm taking the time to get a good start to the day taking just a few minutes to get ready properly. I write all of this as I'm sitting here in my pjs thinking about how I wished I would have gotten ready first thing this morning so that I would have the time for it, and I'd feel great about myself.

On an unrelated note, I entered Ella's photo into the I Heart Faces contest this week. I Heart Faces is opening this challenge up for voting, and I would love if you would vote for Ella (if you like the picture, of course!). She's entry number 8! Thank you!

More Thankful Everyday

Thanksgiving always reminds me to really think about the things that I am thankful for in my life. I have been blessed greatly, and I'm thankful for many things, but one of the things I am most thankful for is my husband.

He is supportive, loving, and trustworthy. He is wise and level-headed (even when I'm not). He is funny and knows how to make me laugh. He is perceptive and knows when something is wrong with me, and he knows how to cheer me up. He knows when I need a break - when I need a chance to unwind and relax - and he gives me that time even if it means driving around a fussy baby so I can have a few minutes of peace and quiet. He is a great father and husband. He makes my life better.

As I've gotten older, I've realized more and more the importance of choosing one's spouse wisely. I've always been thankful for my husband, but as our years together grow longer, I've come to love and appreciate him even more.  I know that I made a good decision when I chose to marry him. I'm thankful to be sharing and living my life with my best friend. I'm thankful to be married to someone who is trying to help me get to heaven, and who is helping me raise our children in the Lord. I am more thankful everyday that I chose to marry him, and that he found me fit to by his wife.

Becoming the Worthy Wife of Proverbs 31

(The blog hosting the weekly Far Above Rubies series about the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 has been taking a break these past few weeks, so I thought I would take this opportunity to post a related article that I wrote a while back. I was honored when my husband asked me to write this article to pair with an article he was writing about being worthy of the worthy wife. Here's the article I wrote from the perspective of a young woman learning how to become the worthy wife of Proverbs 31.)


Christian women often study, and rightly so, Proverbs 31:10-31 as an example of how we ought to live our lives. We read and study the characteristics of this woman who is described as rare and valuable, but how can we put these characteristics in practice? How do we become the virtuous wife of Proverbs 31? Principally, to become a virtuous wife a woman must fear the Lord (Proverbs 31:30). In Proverbs 1:7 Solomon writes: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.” When we fear the Lord, we give Him honor, and we obey the commands found in His Word. When our lives are founded upon serving the Lord, we ought to be able to lead lives like that of the worthy woman.

The qualities of the virtuous wife described throughout Proverbs 31:10-31 originate from her desire to serve the Lord. She puts others first, taking care of their needs (Proverbs 31:15, 20, 27). She works very hard, inside her household and outside her household (Proverbs 31:13-22; 24; 27); and because she works hard, she does not have to worry about not providing the things her family needs (Proverbs 31:21). As young women, we should have hands that are busy with work that profits our husband and children as well others around us; we should not be lazy. We should demonstrate the work ethic described in Colossians 3:23-24: “And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ.”

The virtuous wife is trustworthy: an asset, not a burden, to her husband (Proverbs 31:11-12). Although trust should be a foundation in a marriage, a young wife must build up her husband’s trust by doing him good and not evil, putting others first, and working hard (1 Peter 3:1-6, Philippians 2:4, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, Ecclesiastes 9:10). The virtuous wife is also careful and kind in her speech (Proverbs 31:26). We must learn to use wisdom in our words as described in Proverbs 15:1-2: “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, but the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness.” We must gain control of our tongue and speak with goodness as illustrated in Proverbs 16:23-24: “The heart of the wise teaches his mouth, and adds learning to his lips. Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.”

Becoming the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 is not a simple, quick, or easy task. If being the virtuous wife was a simple task, she would not be considered as rare and valuable as rubies (Proverbs 31:10). It is something that we must constantly be working towards in our lives. As younger women we should look to the older women for guidance, as Paul instructs the older women to teach the younger women in these areas (Titus 2:3-5).We should also continually look to God’s Word for guidance, seeking to do His commands all the days of our lives (Ecclesiastes 12:13-14). When we seek to do His commands we will exhibit the characteristics of the rare woman described in Proverbs 31. The virtuous wife’s worth is based on the fact that she fears the Lord, and the way she lives her life because she fears the Lord.


(If you'd like to read my posts so far in the Far Above Rubies series, click here!)

Proverbs 31:22

(To read previous posts in this series first, click here.)

I have really been slacking at getting this post written this week. Partly because I have been busy, but also partly because I've struggled a bit with it.

Proverbs 31:22 (NKJV): " She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple."

I think I struggle with this verse because it almost goes against my intuition as to what I would expect it to say about how the virtuous wife would dress. Throughout the years, I've heard many and even taught some lessons about modesty. I know there is a general misconception that modest must equal frumpy, ugly, boring, or even poor quality and perhaps that is what came to the back of my mind when I envision how the worthy woman would dress. However, a woman can dress modestly and still be stylish, pretty, well put-together, and have quality clothing. Although this verse does not specifically mention modesty, I find it hard to think that her clothing would be praised if it were not modest, considering the teaching on modesty throughout the rest of the Scriptures. This verse, however, does mention something about the quality and appearance of her clothing. The terms "fine linen" and "purple" describe clothing that is beautiful and of high quality. I picture this woman as well-put together - something I honestly need to work on. I'm certainly guilty of not caring too much about what I'm wearing, especially when I'm going to be around the house all day.

With all that said, I think it is also important to consider a passage found in 1 Peter 3:1-6: "Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives when they observe your chaste behavior accompanied by fear. Do not let your adornment be merely outward - arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel - rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror."

The woman described in 1 Peter had more depth than simply a beautiful appearance and the same can certainly be said of the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31. Although I plan to discuss it in more detail when we get to that point in the series, I think Proverbs 31:30 should be mentioned here: "Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised."

Proverbs 31:13-15

I know, I know . . .I'm WAY behind on my posts going through Proverbs 31. But I'm catching up now! I've been doing a lot of study on these passages, but I haven't had much of an opportunity to actually blog about my study. I'm thankful I have some time now. These posts are part of a discussion that Kristen started on her blog, Bringing Up Benjamin.

Proverbs 31:13-15: "She seeks wool and flax, and willingly works with her hands. She is like the merchant ships,  she brings her food from afar. She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household, and a portion for her maidservants."


I've read this passage several times, and the quality that is immediately evident from these verses is that the woman of Proverbs 31 is a very hard worker. She's a hard worker whose purpose is not selfish; rather, she is working hard to provide for those around her. When we look to women in our world today, many are hard workers; however, their hard work often seems misguided and selfish, not focusing on things that are really important.

However, beyond the concept of hard work, as I considered these verses further, the word willingly stood out to me. The woman of Proverbs 31 is not only a hard worker, she works willingly. Dictionary.com defines willingly as "disposed or consenting", or "cheerfully consenting and ready". I see her as a woman who has the proper attitude about the work she is doing. I know that there are many times in my life that I may be working hard, but not willingly, and I'm truly lacking the proper attitude. I want and need to have a better attitude about any work that I'm doing.

The Need for Tranquility

You might think that the title of this post seems a bit odd for someone who is the mother of an eleven-month-old, but hear me out. Recently I started reading You're Singing My Song by Glenn and Cindy Colley, a Bible-based book dealing with marriage. I haven't finished reading it yet, but I've really been enlightened by some of the things I've read up to this point. Some things I've read have really made me think about how perhaps I've allowed myself to grow into some bad practices - some that I really ought to grow out of.

I'm not even sure how to properly characterize this particular practice I want to eliminate, but I know what word accurately describes the desired end result: tranquility. One of the first chapters in the book deals with the idea that a wife should have a meek (gentle) and quiet spirit from this passage in 1 Peter 3:1-4:

"Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chase conduct accompanied by fear. Do not let your adornment be merely outward - arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel - rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God."

My life can (and does) become so overwhelming and stressful at times, but much of that is because I allow it to become that way. I want my life to be still, peaceful - tranquil and free from unnecessary stress. I want to help make our home a place of comfort, safety, coziness, and security - a refuge from the world. However, if my spirit isn't gentle and quiet, our home cannot properly exhibit those qualities.

For me personally, one of the greatest barriers to me exhibiting a quiet spirit is time management (or perhaps discipline might be another way to put it). I must learn to properly allot my time. I have caused much stress on myself, as well as my husband, because I don't appropriately allot my time. I don't mean that I need to schedule every minute of my day. Rather, I need to realize what things I need to spend my time doing and what things I don't need to spend my time doing. For those things that I deem necessary to spend time doing, I need to figure out how much time I really should be spending on them. Some things I ought to spend more time doing, and some things I ought to spend less time doing.

I hope that I can transform into a person that doesn't bring unnecessary stress into the home. I hope that as a wife and mother I can provide my family with comfort and security - tranquility - by properly fulfilling my role as the keeper of the home.

Out of Order

So, this post should have been my first post, but I'm doing things a little out of order. The idea for this blog has been rolling around in my head for quite a while now, but until last week I really couldn't settle on a name, and I wanted the perfect name. I'm not sure I came up with the perfect name, but it is really suiting my tastes at the moment for what I want this blog to be about. :) Anyway, I finally got in gear and started the blog up, partially from the motivation of the photography blog "I Heart Faces." I really wanted to enter their "Fix-It Friday" last week, and I needed a blog to show my "fix" (even though my fix really paled in comparison to the other entries). In my rush to get my fix in for the site, I never had time to write my entry about why I wanted to write this blog, and what I wanted it to be about. Doing things out of order seems to happen quite frequently, as life gets in the way of all the plans I've made.

There are so many things that I want to be. I want to be a good wife and a good mother. I want to be a good photographer, a good cook, and a good keeper of the home. I want to be motivated and active. I want to be healthy and helpful. I want to be informed and curious. I want to contend earnestly for the faith, striving daily to serve the Lord as I should (Jude 1:3). The list of things I want to be could continue on, but I'll save those things for now. I'm doing better at being what I want to be on some of the things I listed than I am on others. Hopefully this blog will be a way to share my journey, as well as communicate with others about living the lives we want to live.